Fun With Lists

Unlockable achievements we’d like to see in The Beatles: Rock Band video game.

1.Sing backup as Yoko feature that automatically fails if more than three notes are sung in tune.

2. Playing game backward reveals that Paul is dead.

3. Intermittent battle sequences between the Beatles and armies of resurrected zombie corpses representing the blues and R&B artists they ripped off throughout their career.

4. Successful completion of “Norwegian Wood” requires gamers to use plastic toy sitar.

5. Bonus remix club mash-ups, including “Ticket to Ridin’ Dirty,” “Ob-La-Di, Ob-Lodi-Dodi” and “All You Need Is Love in This Club.”

6. Extended scene wherein John and Paul get into a fistfight over a chicken-salad sandwich.

7. Power-up allowing Ringo’s stupid-looking sunglasses to shoot laser beams into the audience.

8. Archival footage of George Harrison taking bong hits and mumbling nonsensically about energy fields and karmic retribution.

9. Bonus “Come Together” multiplayer challenge involves heated games of toe-jam football.

10. Playing as Paul McCartney involves divorce settlement stage where player must perform a collection of Wings songs while dodging projectile prosthetic legs.