Fan taunts we'd like to see at Saturday's Texas-Oklahoma game at the Cotton Bowl

1. "The river will run red with your blood!"

2. "Today's forecast is cloudy with a chance of you suck!"

3. "If we all wish hard enough, Khloe Kardashian might go away forever!"

4. "Win or lose, we will all do massive, irreversible damage to our kidneys and livers this weekend!"

5. "The outcome of this annual sporting event, however steeped in proud tradition, will not in any way affect the ongoing slave-raider crisis on Planet Gorgothax!"

7. "Should that last taunt have used the word 'effect' instead of 'affect'? I always get those two confused!"

8. "Push 'em back! Push 'em back! Not a belly-itcher!"

9. "Did you see last week's episode of The New Adventures of Old Christine? Who writes these things?"

10. "Can you feel the love tonight? No? That's probably because I hate you."

Geoff Johnston

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