Zip: Hello, sports fans and welcome to another installment of Sports Chat! I'm Zip Zippler!

Calamity: And I'm Calamity Dinkens. Well, Zip, it's that time of year again!

Zip: That's right, Cal. Everyone knows October is National Kitchen and Bath Month.

Calamity: Actually, I was referring to Texas-OU weekend, Zip.

Zip: Ah, yes. Of course.

Calamity: One of college athletics' most anticipated competitions, the Red River Rivalry pits the University of Texas Longhorns against –

Zip: A savage, bloodthirsty Minotaur!

Calamity: What?

Zip: Crazy, right?

Calamity: No, that would be incredibly dangerous and, considering that the Minotaur is a creature of myth, completely impossible.

Zip: You're sure?

Calamity: Yes. They actually face off against the University of Oklahoma Sooners.

Zip: How is it any less dangerous and impossible if a Minotaur fights the Sooners, Cal?

Calamity: It's not.

Zip: You're gonna have to make up your mind. Who's fighting the Minotaur, then?

Calamity: Nobody, Zip. It's the Longhorns versus the Sooners.

Zip: Hmm, I'm pretty sure you're wrong about this one, Cal. Hey,

I was gonna ask you something.

Calamity: What, Zip?

Zip: This thing on my lip; you

see it?

Calamity: Yeah, I saw it the minute you walked in the room. I've been trying not to look directly at it this whole time. It's all I can do not to throw up all over both of us.

Zip: Yeah, do you think it's herpes? Or is it just a fever blister?

Calamity: I'm really not medically qualified to diagnose your lip sores, Zip.

Zip: C'mon!

Calamity: Can we talk about the Texas-OU game now?

Zip: That's a badminton match, right?

Calamity: Football, Zip.

Zip: Ah, yes.

Calamity: I hate you.

Zip: I miss my wife and daughter.

Sports Chat with Zip Zippler and Calamity Dinkens is brought to you by Gluhrman's Yogurt: "If it ain't Gluhrman's, it's inferior in every conceivable aspect."

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