Astronomers have confirmed that the asteroid known as AZ316 will indeed collide with Earth in approximately nine hours. The force of impact will be the equivalent of a 40,000 megaton nuclaer warhead. It is estimated there will be no survivors.

What do you think about this story? Leave your comments.

Coke-n-Boobs: First!

lisa42: OMG. This is horrible. My poor children.

Miss Thang: I am freaking out. Is there anything we can do?

Phil DeezNuts: You would think they could have spelled nuclear correctly. This is exactly why the newspaper won't survive.

JortsMan: @Phil– Umm, Phil, I don't think ANYONE will survive. well... Keith Richards.

Vagslicebjornbjorn: Second!

RollingStoner13: Keith rulez! Anything pre-Goats Head Soup album.

49er: @ Lisa Why are you so worried about YOUR children? What about the children of people NOT making over $250K a year? Are they not worth anything?

U8boogers: @49er You freaking moron. This isn't about money. It's about the end of life as we know it.

Foodie214: Dramatic much?

Ryan Nolan: @Miss Thang Yeah there is something you can do – shut up. No one wants to here you whine.

Happyhand375: I knew this would happen if Obama became president. I hope everyone likes his Change.

Whocares: At least there won't be any more douchebags down at Primos.

Troy McLure: Like Bush was so much better? He inherited a bedget surplus and now look!

Happyhand375: @Troy Why don't you spellcheck before you post? And yes, Bush was better.

Brian Jones' pool: @RollingStoner13 I gotta disagree on the pre-Goats Head Soup claim. "Some Girls" was greatness.

Romo's Scrotum: Does this mean I can get out of dating Jess?

lisa42: I wasn't saying that children in households under $250K per annum won't be affected by world destruction. I was merely trying to express my maternal anguish. EXCUSE ME!

Toonces the Other Cat: Excuse me is right. Its people like you that make me glad the world is going bye bye.

Job Bluth: I believe the proper contraction for "it is" is "it's" not "its," which is possessive. Didn't anyone go to college?

Qbert!?@!: AMERICA WILL SURVIVE!

SpettE: @Qbert Turn off all caps. Its considered shouting.

Job Bluth: IT'S NOT ITS!!

SpettE: Your shouting.

Comic32: Keith Richards and the Stones suck ballz.

Preacherman: I can't believe Humanity will be destroyed. We have created so many great things. Thank goodness we have developed tools such as this to more effectively communicate with one another.

LastWurd: Meh.

Hear Gordon on "The Ticket" KTCK-AM (1310) weekdays from 5:30 to 10 a.m. E-mail him at gordon@gordonkeith.com.